Lemming, or "If everyone jumped off a cliff, would you?"

I volunteered at the school this morning, my usual weekly visit to the library and Alex's classroom. The school library is in slight disarray because of the book fair - kids are in and out looking for the perfect book on which to spend their hard-earned money. That went quietly enough. When I got to Alex's classroom my first mission was to find his lunchbox. It's been AWOL since Friday, despite being gray and orange camouflage with his initials monogrammed on it. I've ransacked the pantry and kitchen here at home and told Alex to check his cubby and classroom. He denied finding it there, but he regularly can't find items right in front of him, so I didn't really trust him on that.

Unfortunately, I didn't see it in his room either. That left the dread lost-and-found to go through. When I say lost-and-found, you may imagine a good-sized cardboard box with a couple of jackets and a backpack in it. It is so much worse than that. I hate trying to find things there. The school has two enormous bins in a storage closet with the cafetorium (love that word!) chairs. The school custodians wished me luck as I went in. Now, the bins: think about giant laundry bins that prisoners in movies hide in and use to escape. Both are overflowing with jackets, coats, sweatshirts, bags, backpacks and at least one thermos that I saw. I can't tell how happy that I was when I unearthed (uncoated?) the lunchbox a foot or two down in the first bin. I may start tying it to Alex every morning.

After that was done, I headed back to see what project I could help with in the classroom. This week the multi-age class is working on South Carolina. They've learned the state motto, highest point, flower, etc. I helped a couple of groups who were using strips of construction paper to "weave" placemats while they learned about the lowcountry sawgrass basket makers. Another group put together a floor puzzle of the United States. I helped with some of the hard parts. I showed them the little man that was formed with Louisiana as his boot, and Minnesota as his head. Sadly, Minnesota is missing, so he's kind of headless right now. They thought that was funny.

At mid-morning, when they headed out to recess, I left to go to work. All was well at that point. I repeat, at that point. I'd been at work for a little more than a half hour when my cell phone rings. It always worries me when my cell rings, especially when I noticed the caller ID. I have the school's phone number memorized at this point, so I knew it was Nurse Karen. (Okay, I gave Alex the benefit of the doubt - it could have been the principal but Alex didn't seem to be that belligerent when I left, so I didn't think there'd been enough time for a discipline problem.) "I just left!" I told Nurse Karen. Alex was hurt but she didn't think too badly. She reported that he jumped off the monkey bars, landed flat on his feet, then his rear end. He was complaining of back pain but nothing seemed to be broken.

So, I left work to pick up Daredevil Dan. I also put in a call to the pediatrician (also on speed dial in my phone). When I got back to the school, an hour and twelve minutes after I left, Alex was waiting with the nurse, with an ice pack on his back. I began the interrogation in the car. It seems that his friend Aileen (a cute little kindergartener) and Alex were playing at recess when they decided to jump off this playground implement because it was "gymnastics." I drove around to that side of the school and asked him to point out which piece of playground equipment they'd used. Alex jumped from approximately five feet up. Aileen stuck her landing, possibly because she takes GYMNASTICS, Alex did not, possibly because he got half his coordination genes from me. He was moving fine but winced when he sat down, bent at the waist, stood up or had to turn his body. The pediatrician's nurse recommended ibuprofen and alternating ice and heat for a while. That's how we've spent our afternoon.

As we drove to get a heating pad and ice pack at the drugstore I said, "Alex?" What, Mom? "I know it hurts so I'm not going into a lot of detail, but DON'T JUMP OFF ANYTHING HIGHER THAN YOUR HEAD!" Okay, Mom. We'll see how long it lasts.

Teacher's Pet (Wolf)

Okay, here is my not-so-secret hope: that I am not the only mother in the world that gets notes from schools like the ones that regularly come home with Alex. Examples include entries such as, "Followed school rules? No, was talking during quiet time. Following directions today? did not, was howling when the teacher explained them, Stayed on task/finished work? No, was too busy talking" and "Sat on friend's head while he was trying to get something from cubby!" As far as we can tell from our interrogations most of these things were done because it seemed funny at the time. The stern parental response would work better if Alex's father was not snorting beside me when I read the riot act to the kid. When I argue that it's not funny, Art replies, "Yes, it is." See what I have to live with, people?

We are 3 stars away (on our behavior chart) to either a trip to Chuck E. Cheese's or a new Nintendo DS game. We've been working on the same chart for weeks. He has to get 3 out of 3 check marks from his teacher and a star at after school care to earn one. We may never finish. Earlier this week when I checked him out after school they told me that he'd earned EXTRA stars for being so helpful. Really? Are you sure you know him - curly-headed kid, about 4 feet tall? They just laughed. We had a close call last week and almost got a 3 out of 3, but the teachers went in and changed one with just half an hour left in the day. Missed it by that much. Alex did have to go home sick one day last week right around lunch time. As we drove home he said, I got all 3 stickers on my chart. I pointed out that people who may or may not have fever and are moaning with a stomach ache rarely misbehave.

If I haven't mentioned it lately (and I definitely haven't done it enough) - Alex has three really great teachers. They're managing two classrooms, 42 students and lots of messy art supplies. I don't know how they do it. And my weekly volunteer time makes me glad they are and that I'm not!